Lessons in Living and Dying

Each day brings a choice to let your light shine and enjoy the beauty that surrounds you and to count your blessings.

While caring for my husband who recently died from complications, I found blessings in many small things such as the view from our deck.  It was my choice to be sad and depressed or to count the blessings I had and would receive from keeping a positive attitude.  You get from the Universe what you ask for and you don't get what you don't ask for.  Sadness and depression brings sadness and depression but counting blessings brings more blessings.  I, also, had to learn that the path my husband had chosen to reach enlightenment and transition was his path and I could only support him.  It was not my choice to try and change his beliefs to make his path easier or my life easier as his caregiver.  I could offer enlightened readings and ideas but he had to be the one to embrace any changes in his belief system.  

Richard had a strong belief that he had to suffer before he died so that he would go to Heaven.  As a result, even  if he gave me permission to do energy work, his deep belief would not allow him to feel better and he would actually feel worse. This was a hard lesson for me to learn because I wanted so much to ease his suffering.  Once I accepted that I could only support his journey to enlightenment and transition, many paths opened up for him to have learning opportunities from others.  

We were blessed to have Hospice come and take care of my husband for the last year and a half.  A Hospice volunteer came once a week to read to my husband.  A better description is a Hospice angel.  He and my husband read the Bible and talk about many things.  My husband came to see a more loving and forgiving God that helped to ease his fear of dying.  I gave my husband Sylvia Browne's book on Angels several months before he died.  Our volunteer Angel read it to him and had started over again at my husbands request.  This was a great turning point in my husbands enlightenment and instead of hallucinating and seeing people he didn't know, he was able to distinguish who were the angels in the room.  

Three weeks before my husband died, he saw his Pop and his aunts and they showed him what Heaven was like.  He was overwhelmed with the Love he felt and the beauty of Heaven and for the next three weeks he described to me everyday this Love and beauty.  As he continued to decline, I encouraged him to go to the Light when the Light appeared to him.  I told him that this was his guide to Heaven and he would no longer have to suffer in pain and in a world unknown to him at times.  He often did not know where he was and would want to go home. 

As he became weaker and weaker, he kept asking if he could go and I would tell him yes.  I told him his journey was complete and he had learned all his life lessons.  He would look at me with loving eyes and tell me he could not leave me just yet.  As his birthday approached, he kept asking to go and would ask what day it was.  I would tell him and he would say he would wait until his birthday.  On the day of his birthday, he woke and I feed him his breakfast and gave him his medicines and he went back to sleep.  As the time for his party approached, I was starting to get ready when he called me.  He said: "Come quick, I see the Light and I have to go.  I need to tell you bye."  I told him I loved him and goodbye and he said the same and then he went blue and semi-conscious. 

He went in an out out of consciousness that day.  An elder from our church came by and we had communion together with his nephew.  He woke up to greet out minister and then back to unconsciousness.  By the next morning he had only garbled speech and did not respond to voice stimuli.  He had a temperature of 104 and I was giving Atropine drops to keep the death rattles at bay.  I also gave his pain medication sublinqually. Ipacked him in ice and gave him alcohol baths to bring his temperature down.  He continued like this for the next 2 days even with encouragement to go to the Light. 

On the third day I ask our Hospice angel to come by and hold energy for me so that I could provide a Healing Touch technique to help open my husbands energy centers so that he could connect with Spirit more readily.  My husband's nephew had come to spend the night because we knew time was drawing near for my husband to leave.  Spiral meditation and Chakra Spread is a very sacred technique to help ease dying. After we finished, my husband's temperature dropped 2 degrees and he went into a very peaceful sleep. 

Shortly after, his nephew and I also went to bed.  I was awakened at 2:30 am and saw that my husband's time for crossing over was near and I woke his nephew up.  I had the lights low and candles burning and soft music playing and we encouraged him to  go to the Light and that he had completed his journey and was ready to cross over.We watch him become more and more translucent and a soft white glow surrounded him.  His nephew told my husband he would take care of everything.  I bent down and told my husband that I wanted to thank him for raising his nephew to be such a loving, caring man and that he would make such a wonderful "Daddy" for our family and that he would take good care of me.  My husband immediately released his soul and he crossed over peacefully.  It was a beautiful and caring experience and I was very blessed to have my husband tell me goodbye and that he loved me and to watch him peacefully cross over.

I miss him so much but I know he is in a place of Love and beauty with no more suffering, no more pain and no more confusion.  This is the best blessing of all.